Just Call Me "The Enforcer"

We're in a pickle. A tight spot. Between a rock and hard place.

Clay is in class with a little guy who has it rough. He lives with his grandma, not his parents. He packs his lunch himself, according to Clay, which isn't a bad thing for a third grader. Except that he packs chips and candy. And then he doesn't eat even that at lunch time.

When mom was visiting over the holidays, we had lunch with Clay and this little guy sat across from us. And he didn't eat lunch that day either. He is a card. Over-the-top personality. Craving some major attention. Mom and I were actually a bit annoyed because it was hard to have any quality time with Clay with Jerry Lewis Jr. sitting at the table.

But since then, Clay has mentioned other things and my heart just goes out to this mini "Jerry". He was on Clay's Upwards basketball team, too, for the past two months. He's a sweet kid. He just isn't in an ideal situation.

I've met his grandmother, and she seems very nice. But a grandma raising a kid is very different than a younger parent raising a kid. I'm not sure I'd have it in me to spank my grandchild, whereas, I'm A-OK with spanking my kids when they get out of line.

We've been praying for "Jerry". And I asked Clay if he might want to invite him to ride the school bus home with him one Wednesday and then after supper he could go with Clay to Awanas. Clay seemed interested, but he kept forgetting to mention it to the other boy.

I found out through another parent the other night that Clay was going to be losing his play time at school the next day. This other parent has a daughter in Clay's class. Her daughter had told her that "Jerry" was rough-housing with Clay and when Clay told him to cut it out, they both got busted by the teacher.

So I asked Clay if he was really forgetting to ask the other boy if he wanted to come over or if he just didn't want to invite him. Ding, ding, ding! Two points for mother's intuition.

The other boy obviously wants to be friends with Clay, but he's going about it all wrong.

Tonight at bed time, Clay told me some more ways "Jerry" is really bugging him. It centered around lunchtime.

So I said, "I think it's time for you to maybe sit with someone else in the cafeteria."

He explained that "Jerry" is either waiting for him to sit first and then joining him, or he waits on Clay.

I asked if his teacher was aware of Clay's feelings. He said she was.

I'd been thinking of going another round of having lunch with each kid again on different days in the cafe, so I told Clay, "I'll just join you for lunch some time soon. Okay?"

And he said to me, "Good. That should take care of it."

I was thinking, "Really? You think just having me there is going to solve this long term?" But I didn't say anything.

Evidently Clay thinks I'm going to chew out this other boy.

Because then my son said, "But try not to break his heart, mom. He already doesn't get to live with his parents. Let's not make it worse on him."

I didn't laugh, but I promised him I'd "be good".

I feel for that other boy. I want to love on him and just make it all better. If only it were that easy.

I told Bruce when we first got married that one day I'd like to own a farm. Not to do any farming. But because when I was a kid I always brought home stray pets, and I figured, if we had a farm, I could just keep them all.

I'm over the pet thing.

But I get the same feeling when I see how hard some of my kids' classmates have it.

And how exactly do you show Jesus to someone when your son just really wants some distance from that person?

We're in a jam.

But we're still praying for him. Even Clay. Even though he's bugged by "Jerry".