Warfare

What is it about boys that no matter how well you try to shield them, they turn everything into a weapon?

For years we wouldn't let our boys play with guns. The toy kind. You know I didn't mean the real thing, right? But because so many toy guns can look authentic, I've even had a talk with my oldest about touching any gun at the homes of friends or other family members until he checks with an adult that it is a play thing. Bruce says I go overboard, but accidents happen, so eagerly overboard I go.

Still, somewhere along the way, the boys started pointing sticks found in the yard at each other and shouting "Bam, bam, bam. I gotcha!" They did that until I went overboard and said, "No pointing even pretend guns at people."

If they were stick poor that day, they'd just point their first finger and tuck the rest back and shoot stuff with their "hand" guns.

I've seen Tinkertoys turned into weapons. Legos as well. Even the empty, cardboard paper towel holder. In their warped little minds, with enough imagination, anyone can be the proud owner of a nice, shiny Uzi.

The other day, Spencer crossed into some spiritual warfare. But not the kind talked about in Ephesians where it says, "For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places." (6:12)

On second thought, maybe it was exactly that kind.

We were at the post office to mail Mother's Day cards. There was only one person in front of us, and nobody behind us while we waited our turn. But about four people walked in as our turn came. Because we always need an audience these days.

I stepped up to get the appropriate stamps for my cards to Germany, and Spencer points at Allison and says to the clerk, "She doesn't love Jesus."

My eyes nearly popped out of my head. But that precious boy was not finished.

"She doesn't love Jesus," he continued, "because she doesn't read her Bible."

Allison's eyes nearly popped out of her head. I was determined not to make a big deal out of this. Because of the audience. But Allison didn't see any reason to hold back.

"That's not true!" she shouted.

Yippee! Now we're really center stage. What I love most in the world.

And still, Spencer was loaded and cocked to fire off his next round.

"And Jesus doesn't love her either."

I was flabbergasted. And Spencer had that little smile on his face that he gets when he knows I'm cornered and can't spank him at that moment. He was obviously enjoying himself. I told him to hush and that "Jesus loves everyone."

I looked at the clerk, shrugged, and said, "No matter what you teach them..." I hoped that was enough of an explanation.

You know what the clerk did? He looked at Spencer and smiled and started singing, "Jesus Loves Me." Yep, he was slightly off key, a little warbly, but he got all the words right.

However, Spencer's right to terrorize could not be denied. He said, "But Jesus doesn't love her," and he pointed at his sister.

I could have throttled him. In Jesus name. (Thanks to Chonda Pierce for that little bit.)

Again, I looked at the clerk and said, "You think maybe we need to spend more time at church?" He laughed and we left.

After a good tongue lashing, Spencer apologized to Allison.

All this happened as we were on our way to Bible Study Fellowship. I think Jesus knew exactly where we all needed to be that morning.


"Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it."
-Proverbs 22:6